Bell curve.

Sometimes I feel that I am so much more complex than the average human. Perhaps I am at one end of that bell curve. My mind goes a billion miles an hour.

Wednesday.

I was thinking on Monday night as I walked to my car after class "I love school!" If I had it my way I would be a lifelong student and not do anything else (Ok... other than sex and reading, but reading is a part of being a student right?). I am really sad for the semester to be over because I really enjoyed all three of my classes. I know that next semester I will probably feel the same way, but right now I can't see that. I am taking two Child & Family Studies classes next semester. I am not going to get the same variety of people in those classes that I had in my speech class. I need a way to meet intelligent, interesting and diverse people.

Groups.

Last night I met with five other students from my speech class for a group speech project. Our professor rocks and is allowing us to videotape the final project and play the tape for class. So we spent four hours goofing off and videotaping. I can't remember the last time I had that much fun! Out of the six of us, two are from China and one is from Nepal. Only two of us are women; all of our ages span about 30 years with the youngest being 20 and the oldest probably almost 50. Yet we all had fun, we all goofed off, we all got each others humor. Why can't I find more groups like that? I love diversity! I love meeting people! I love having fun!

What does it mean to be a woman?

"Dammit!! It's coming back!" That just came out of Carrera's mouth. We're all eating Scooby snax and although my stomach has been a pain, my "gall bladder" pain had seemed to disappear over the last couple of days. Well, its hurting now, so Carrera was just repeating what her mama said ten seconds earlier.

I'm not sure if I have written much about my health recently. Perhaps I avoid the topic because I think it will all just go away. The newest theory is that I have a stomach ulcer. What! Invincible Rachel has an ulcer!! No way!! I am in total denial. I am supposed to be able to work 50 hours a week in a semi-stressful job, spend my evenings working on my degree, while being a wife, mom, sister, daughter, friend... oh and with 5 or 6 hours of sleep a night, while keeping that smile on my face and spring in my step. The pride I feel is great. I DO do it. I'm genuinely cheerful and energetic most days (thanks partially to anti-depressant miracle pills). I recently told Shane that I think I have adult ADD. I have so much energy some days I don't know what to do with it.

Well, back to the damn stomach. At the end of October I started feeling a pressure behind my ribs on the right side (my right). I thought I'd pulled a muscle possibly doing yard work. It didn't go away and slowly got worse. It felt like a baby kicking my in the ribs (having carried twins to full term that rib kicking has a special place in my heart). Eventually with the urge from Shane and others I went to the doctor. I lost 40 lbs between July and September and my doctor thought maybe my organs were shifting from the weight loss, but ordered an ultra sound on my gall bladder and the surrounding organs. Along with this strange "pain" (I use that word loosely because it is more irritating than painful, and if you have had a baby kick you in the ribs you may understand what I mean) I had stomach aches when I ate. Just mild ones usually, but they have been getting worse. It makes me not even want to eat some days. Well, Shane brought my into the emergency room a week ago Saturday thinking that I was going to die. My stomach got so upset that I puked (which I almost never do). The ER doctor did some tests and said: you may have an ulcer. WTF! What kind of answer is that! Well, my MD must agree because I started ulcer medication today.

So, I told myself, and Shane: Why would I get an ulcer!? Doesn't that usually happen to people that are stressed out!? And Shane replied with a simple "yes." Ok, so I can deny that I am stressed I guess, but I really truly believe that I am invincible and can do ANYTHING. Maybe I need to re-evaluate that. I CAN do a lot and juggle it just fine, but maybe my body is trying to tell me that I still need sleep, rest and maybe some relaxation.

BUT, I am a woman.

Post-Thanksgiving.

Post-Thanksgiving Update:

• The last two weeks we have been remodeling our basement to add a room for Colton. We finished our remodel just in time for my brother Josh and sister-in-law Kiki to stay in the room. It turned out better than I even anticipated and it is already nice having the kids each have their own spaces. The last step is building Colton a loft bed. Calvin has one already.
• I just decided last night that Carrera needs a loft bed too. Her room is shared with daycare and toys. Our toy room has become our entire upstairs (except for our bedroom and bathroom). Her bed has become a forbidden area that kids sneak to and jump on. I figured, if I build her a loft bed we could make a play house under it and then daycare would stay off of her bed. Shane made me promise not to start any new projects until January, so it will be a few weeks before I tackle that.
• Two weeks left to the semester. I am very excited to be done with the semester. I am taking 9 credits next semester instead of 12. The reason: I want to spend time with my kids. I'm stretching my degree out an extra year. Sad, yes, but good. I'm sure my daycare parents will be happy. I think all of the kids I have right now except one will be in kindergarten or older when I quit daycare.
• My sister Deb is getting married! In May! Very excited for her! Her fiance Erik came to meet us over Thanksgiving weekend. It was nice to meet him.
• All of us were together over Thanksgiving except for my brother Dan (& his family). That was quite exciting. It was really nice to spend some good time with my sister Deb. We loved having Josh and Kiki stay with us, and hope that next time we can get a little more quality time with them. The house felt very empty when they left.
• I quit eating meat after Thanksgiving. It has been a process. I finally just decided to do it rather than put it off any longer. I do love meat, but can't get over the animal cruelty aspect of it. Shane has been a vegetarian for over 5 years.
• Colton & Calvin are going to be tutored in English reading starting in January twice a week. They are nervous, but I am excited. I don't worry about them learning to read, but they really want to read, so I am glad that they will have someone that can work one on one with them. In some ways I wish it were me teaching them, but I haven't been able to fit in the time.

I'm sure I'm missing some stuff, but that is all for now.