Get excited!

I talked to my sister on the phone last night. She has a new boy in her life and I am thrilled! This morning I thought back to my dating experiences. When I started dating my husband no one was excited for me. I will be ecstatic when my sister gets pregnant. No one was ecstatic when I got pregnant. Why is it acceptable to be excited for some people but not for others?

Colton.

Colton has been so happy. He wakes up with a skip in his step and smile on his face. He is learning his power. He no longer lets Calvin control him. Colton will walk out to the bus alone, he eats lunch at school, he has friends. I am so proud of him!

Love.

I journaled this morning about what I think love is.

Shane and I have very different needs and sometimes when life gets busy we forget that we need to work at our love. I am a sucker for verbal affirmations and Shane needs to be physically affirmed (hugged, kissed, massaged). I like to have deep conversations and Shane likes it when I sit with him when he watches football or reads a good book. I get in trouble almost daily for babbling at Shane while he is reading the paper.

I never have been close to my mother, and loving is not a word that I would use to describe my relationship with either her or my dad. I worry that I will not accurately convey my own love to my kids.

Love is most definitely action, and the easiest way for me to describe what love is to me is: being appreciated.

New School Year.

Colton & Calvin are on their second week of school. They are still in the Chinese immersion program. This year they are in separate classrooms. I think it is going to be very good for Colton to be in his own class separate from Calvin. Already he seems to be more confident and excited about school. Calvin also has really been enjoying school. I think that they were bored the last few weeks of summer. They have a chore list that started when school started. It definitely is nice to delegate some work to them. They also get an allowance which is determined by doing their chores and positive behavior. They turned seven last week, and have been playing G.I.Joe in all their free time. They are having six friends over on Friday for a birthday party. This is the first friend party they have had. I'm a little nervous.

In some ways the house is quiet again, just like it was last year when school started. But this year B. and Carrera don't nap, and we have been doing preschool during nap time. Carrera reminds me of Calvin. She never wants to STOP doing her school work. I am finding it amazing all that she knows that I didn't know she knows. She can recognize most of her letters, some words, and her colors. She'll definitely be reading before she starts kindergarten. I'm not sure about her being potty trained though. She is too smart I think. She realises that it is easier to pee in a diaper or on the floor instead of going to the bathroom. She also can see right through all my manipulation tactics. She did do great for the first week or two that we potty trained, so we know that she gets the concept and she knows when she has to go. She turned three at the end of August. I'm really in no hurry to push her to grow up although she does that herself. She and B. have become my little helpers.

I added one new daycare child the week before school started so now I watch six in addition to my three. The new daycare child's mother is a school teacher (and neighbor), so when Colton and Calvin are home often times she won't be here. I will be adding a seventh child part time in a few weeks. She will have the same part time schedule as B. So on Monday and Wednesday I will have all the kids, and on Tuesday the fewest. Of course my schedule fluctuates some.

I have been a little bored with my college classes this semester. Don't get me wrong, they are interesting, but I just don't have much homework. Plus, when it isn't intense, I procrastinate a little. I have a speech on Monday. I know what I'm going to say, but I still have to write the outline and time myself. I have a ten page paper due December 18th that I might as well write soon too. And I have bi-weekly tests in my third class. I got 97% on the first one, so I'm pretty sure I'll do fine in that class. I plan on taking four classes (12 credits) in the spring and two classes (6 credits) next summer. That would put me on track to graduate a semester earlier than I had planned, and would take me only three years (about 9 credits/semester with summers off). Good for us, sad for daycare. My advisor thinks I should apply for a Graduate Assistentship when I'm done with my undergraduate, so I would probably retire from daycare and work on my Masters full-time. I really hate to think about it because I love all my babes, and I want to stay in their lives. I try not to think about it too much. So much can happen in the next three or four years. I could decide to take a semester off or not take as many classes. And if I don't get an assistentship then I would possibly work on my Masters part-time. It feels great to have goals and to work towards something that I really want.

My "babes"

Tonight as I sat at Caribou chatting with a friend I began telling stories about my babes-the six that call my place home during the day, and the three that are permanent. As I heard myself talk I could hear the passion and excitement, and feel the intense love I have for all nine. I think I need to talk more.